Highland Fling 2012 - the search for the Loch Pedder Monster

Where's Neutron?

Outgoing Joint Master Neutron P!ss admitted that he's never looked at the Chardonnay blog!  Will this post get him to look?

Chardonnay Mismanagement 2012

Grand Master - Pole Dancer
Joint Masters - Can't Stop and Cereal Box
On Sec - TopDek
Hash Cash - Captain Condom and Dodi
Hash Hops - Clearfell
Tucker F*ckers - Bucket, Prick It and Nancy Boy
Hash Lips - Pee Wee and Hamburglar
Trailmaster - Chris Miss
Haberdasherer - Trust Me
Hash Flash - Lone Arranger
Hash Horn - Grizzly
RA - Goblet

Chardonnay's Iconic 2011 Nash Hash Run

The Chardonnay team has successfully completed there Iconic Nash Hash Run. With the assistance of Chris Miss, Hamburglar, Softy, A Bit Of This, Psycho, Red Dress, Prickit, Goblet, That Prick Over There, Dirty Dero Dave, Jack Sh#t, Nuetron Piss, Top Dek, Aa Soo, Pullit, Grass Roots, Arse Cutter, Magpie, Scrotum and Dodi this Nash Hash Run did the Chardonnay Club extremely proud.

All members of this team performed the allocated tasks in a positive and a helpful manner and all visitors were very satisfied. With Cameo performances from Herr Flick and Grizzly during the lip sessions the day went of without a blemish.

I would like to personally and publicly thank all of the above mentioned hashers for their endevors on the day. I would also like to that the support that was provided from the Nash Hash Organising Committee. Chardonnay is a great club and the traditions that Chardonnay has developed need to be preserved and were clearly a stand out during the Lip Session.

Thank You

On On Captain Condom

Facebook

Chardonnay is now available on Facebook. Facebook users just search groups for "Chardonnay Hash House Harriers CH3" There are some great photos already available to see on Facebook with many member already part of this Facebook Group.

A guide to setting a Hash run

Your esteemed Trailmaster, has decreed that Hares should aim to set runs that last for about 45 minutes. Most Hash runners can cover between 6 & 8 kilometres over a period of 45 minutes. Chardonnay Hash runs mostly around the streets so it is easy to drive over your proposed trail in a car to ascertain the approximate length of the run.

The running capabilities of the membership of Chardonnay varies from good to plodders to walkers. Setting a run for such a diverse group requires the Hares to give consideration to all Hounds. If you are intending to set a hard run, the use of a get out point or perhaps a separate inward trail for the walkers, should be considered.

Here are some suggestions for Hares when setting runs.

1/ Know where you are going before you set out

Reconnoiter the run before the run day to make the run as interesting and trouble free as possible. Try to avoid taking the trail up a hill just for the sake of it.

2/ Clearly mark the trail

Use the Chardonnay arrow to avoid confusion with other clubs.

Don't hide the trail as it is important to give the Hounds a clear trail, properly marked especially when changing directions.

3/ Use Checks & False Trails properly

Hash runs have Checks and False Trails to help keep the pack together. Most Checks should be set in such a way to disadvantage the faster runners and assist the plodders and walkers to keep up. False Trails are the best method of slowing down the fast runners as it brings those fast runners back to the pack.

Checks; the run should restart within 100 metres of the Check sign.

False Trails; go back to the last deviation in the trail and the run should restart within 100 metres of the deviation.

4/ Don't be afraid to ask for assistance

If you are a novice Hare, don't be afraid to ask an experienced Hare to assist in the planning and setting of the run. If you are an experienced Hare ask a new hasher to help you set the run. It can also be beneficial to get back to the On-On site before the run starts. This allows time for you to advise the Hounds of any problems i.e. crossing other trails, and also allow the novice Hare to participate in the run to see what worked and what didn't.

5/ Don't be a smart-arse Hare

If you are going to the trouble of setting a run you want people to follow the run. If you become a smart-arse and make the run too difficult, you not only stuff up your own run but the other members of the club know to avoid your runs in the future.

Surely it is better to strive to be the best Hare, not the biggest idiot.

The attitude of that old saying "stuff-em they are only Hashers" should be avoided.

Chardonnay Song

Chardonnay, Hash is great
We run trails till it get's late
With false trails, checks
We try to catch the Hare
We skull wine cause we dont care

Other Clubs, say its a laugh
Chardonnay take it up the ar#e
We all know that its not true
Were all hetro and true blue

H4 and 5 we've hashed there
Chardonnay hashers have no fear
We've fuc##d all their women
And we've buggered all their men
We drank all their beer
And we'll do it all again

Singing of this song is compulsory after all Chardonnay Lip Sessions

Achievements

600 runs Crusher, Captain Condom
500 runs Portholes, Herr Flick, Can't Stop, Dirty Dero Dave, Goblet, Growler, Scrotum, Snack Bar, Pee Wee
450 runs Trust Me,
400 runs Satin, Swallow,  Prick It, Red Dress, Pole Dancer, Spoof
350 runs Pork Sword, Hamburglar, Banger Dan
300 runs Neutron Piss, Cereal Box
250 runs Sticky Mickey, Drawbridge, Pullit,  Zero, Psycho Sally, Sweet Cheeks, Chris Miss
200 runs Wee Bev, Yes Please, Thunderbox, Chockablock, Wet n Wobbly, Back Alley, Bucket, Third Time Lucky, Tit's A Plenty, Hi Ho, Hands On Big Hairy Balls, Bloody Mary, Dodi, Softy, Jack Sh#t, Arse Cutter, Yeti, Grizzly, Nancy Boy, Argue
150 runs Wrinkle, Tits Up, Eager, Barbie's Chatterbox, Milky Bar, Mt Carmel, Fawlty, Grass Roots, Dog Sh#t, Buddha, Lone Arranger, Just Once, Sweet FA, Morticia
100 runs A Bit of This, Centrefold, Riabald, Rootless, Dirty Patti, Thrillseeker, Sh#t Loads, Smallgoods, Sugar Babe, TopDek, Cumming Soon, TPOT, Twinkle Toes
50 runs Vegie, Souvenir, Defurred, Gap Filler, Tight Spot, Sonar, Aa Soo, Short Circuit, Scary Eyeball, Discount, Arse About, Brazilian, Magpie, Derbs, Clearfell

If you know of other Achievements make a comment and we will adjust as soon as possible.

History

Founded on 21st January 1999

How it all happened - the founding of Chardonnay Hash House Harriers

For a couple of years prior to 1999, a handful of H4 hashers met on a Thursday evening at the offices of Creese and Ransley, 150 Davey Street. We would go for a run mainly through Battery Point, around the wharf area, and up Davey Street back to Scrambles' office.

For some time we had pondered over whether Hobart could support another club that ran midweek, not on the traditional hash Monday night, but nothing further eventuated. Quite often during our run, we would pass Gilbert “Trembles” Leitch walking home to South Hobart, and typically Trembles laid back ridicule upon us Hash Athletes with comments like “bunch of poofters, parading around town, just to get a thirst so you can go back to Ran’s office and suck Chardonnay in the company boardroom”. This was usually replied to with things like “fat bastard” or other subtle references to Trembles' lack of athleticism.

However, Trembles had sown the seed; the idea of another hash club resurfaced and it was agreed that if it got going, Chardonnay Hash House Harriers would be a good name. We decided that the club should be mixed and that Thursday night would be the night. Scrambles booked the Globe Hotel for Thursday 21st January 1999. The word was passed around and the rest is history.

Original Chardonnay Hashers were:
Paul “Pee Wee” Green
Mary “Bloody Mary” Alexander
Steve “Music Man” Mannering
Ben “Dr. Benny” Green
Bob “Pork Sword” Sawdy
Ross “Music Boy” Mannering
Dennis “Scrambles” Ransley
Leanne “Bundy” Koeck
Wayne “Crusher” Hall
Lesley “Satin” Blackburn

History according to Pee Wee

MILESTONES
1st Run - Globe Hotel on 21st January 1999
50th Run - Hope and Anchor on 9th December 1999
100th Run - Good Woman Inn on 24th November 2000
111th Run - Risdon Brook Dam on 8th February 2001
150th Run - Good Woman Inn on 18th October 2001
200th Run - Polish Club on 13th September 2002
222nd Run - Parliment Street Park on 6th February 2003
250th Run - Polish Club on 1st August 2003
300th Run - Polish Club on 25th June 2004
333rd Run - Old Coach Road on 3rd February 2005
350th Run - Golden Valley on 12th June 2005
400th Run - Polish Club on 20th April 2006
444th Run - Newtown Golf Club on 1st February 2007
450th Run - Tasmanian Hockey Centre on 15th March 2007
500th Run - Polish Club on 24th January 2008
550th Run - Lenah Valley Hall on 18th Nov 2008
555th Run - Polish Club on 22nd January 2009
600th Run -
650th Run -
666th Run - Lindisfarne Sailing Club 13th Jan 2011
700th Run - Sea Scout Hall Kingston 25th Aug 2011

April 2001 - Chardonnay Goes Online

Grand Master
1999 Biddy*
2000 Big G*
2001 Hi Ho
2002 Satin
2003 Crusher
2004 Pork Sword
2005 Herr Flick
2006 Portholes
2007 Captain Condom
2008 Growler
2009 Can't Stop
2010 Goblet
2011 Swallow
2012 Pole Dancer

* token H4 GM who did not attend Chardonnay

Joint Masters
1999 Pee Wee & Scrambles
2000 Chockablock & Pork Sword
2001 Bloody Mary & Herr Flick
2002 Rootless & Portholes
2003 Growler & Goblet
2004 Sticky Mickey & Dirty Dero Dave
2005 Spoof & Swallow
2006 Crusha & Yes Please
2007 Prick It & Snack Bar
2008 Trust Me & Red Dress
2009 Sweet FA & Pole Dancer
2010 Psycho Sally & Smallgoods
2011 Neutron Piss & Banger Dan
2012 Can't Stop & Cereal Box

On Sec
1999 Pee Wee
2000 Eager
2001 Goblet
2002 Psycho Sally
2003 Wet n Wobbly
2004 Portholes
2005 Captain Condom
2006 Drawbridge & Hands On Big Hairy Balls
2007 Spoof
2008 Arse Cutter
2009 Cereal Box
2010 Dodi
2011 Just Once
2012 TopDek

Hash Cash
1999 Pee Wee
2000 Tiny Tim & others
2001 Neutron Piss & Growler
2002 Bucket & Fawlty
2003 Wee Bev & Herr Flick
2004 Pullit
2005 Prick It
2006 Dirty Dero Dave
2007 Chris Miss & Cereal Box
2008 Yeti & Can't Stop
2009 Arse Cutter & Grassroots
2010 TopDek & Pee Wee
2011 Red Dress & Brazilian
2012 Captain Condom & Dodi

Hash Hops
2001 Can’t Stop, Crusha & Dirty Dero Dave
2002 Wedgie
2003 Thunderbox
2004 Scrotum
2005 Yeti
2006 Banger Dan
2007 Nancy Boy
2008 Satin & Pee Wee
2009 Jack Sh#t & Dog Sh#t
2010 Portholes & Short Circuit
2011 Cumming Soon
2012 Clearfell

Tucker F###ers
2001 Drawbridge
2002 Murray the Rat
2003 Centrefold & Planta Box
2004 Sweet Cheeks & Third Time Lucky
2005 Satin & Pee Wee
2006 Sweet Cheeks & Third Time Lucky
2007 Jack Sh#t and Sweet FA
2008 Sweet Cheeks & Third Time Lucky
2009 Argue & Grizzly
2010 Crusher & Grass Roots
2011 Scary Eyeball & Nancy Boy
2012 Bucket, Hamburglar & Nancy Boy

Hash Lips
1999 Portholes
2000 Sticky Mickey & Barbie’s Chatterbox
2001 Swallow & Scrotum
2002 Wrinkle & Red Dress
2003 Yes Please & Captain Condom
2004 Can’t Stop & Dodi
2005 Tit's A Plenty & Snack Bar
2006 Herr Flick & Growler
2007 Psycho Sally & Pole Dancer
2008 Dirty Dero Dave & Buddha
2009 Chris Miss & Softy
2010 Twinkle Toes & Spoof
2011 Hands On & Argue
2012 Pee Wee & Prick It

Trailmaster
1999 Satin
2000 Shitloads
2001 Zero
2002 Feathers
2003 Chockablock
2004 Trust Me
2005 Crusher
2006 Can't Stop
2007 Scrotum
2008 Tit's A Plenty
2009 Just Once & Short Circuit
2010 Prick It
2011 Snack Bar
2012 Chris Miss

Haberdasher
2000 Sticky Mickey
2001 Sticky Mickey
2002 Back Alley
2003 Psycho Sally
2004 Mt Carmel
2005 Not Appointed
2006 Pullit
2007 Pullit
2008 Hands On Big Hairy Balls
2009 Lone Arranger
2010 Morticia
2011 Growler
2012 Trust Me

Hash Flash
2003 Herr Flick
2004 Herr Flick
2005 Captain Condom
2006 Thunderbox
2007 Goblet
2008 Hamburglar
2009 Captain Condom
2010 Grizzly
2011 Softy
2012 Lone Arranger

Hash Horn
1999 Drawbridge
2000 Windscreens & Captain Condom
2001 Captain Condom
2002 Captain Condom
2003 Captain Condom
2004 Pole Dancer
2005 Thunderbox
2006 Hands On Big Hairy Balls
2007 Soft Cock
2008 Smallgoods
2009 Sugarbabe
2010 Hamburglar
2011 TPOT
2012 Grizzly

Web Wanker
2001 - 2007 Captain Condom
2008 - 2012 Captain Condom & Grizzly

Communications Officer
2005 - 2012 Herr Flick (The person who send out all the spamming emails and Trash)

Committee Position Guidelines

Grand Master - This is a Honourary position and should be given in recognition of the contribution that this person has made to Chardonnay. The Grand Master is the figurehead of the club and only guides the JMs if necessary.

A GM should be a Chardonnay hasher who has achieved over 200 runs and has been active over the previous year.

Joint Masters - These two hashers are responsible for running the club for the following year and selecting the incumming committee. These hashers are responsible for organising , the Highland Fling, Christmas Run, The AGPU and other major milestone runs.

On Sec - This hasher is responsible for the weekly production of the Hash Trash, either by electronic or printed production.

Treasurer - This Hasher has the responsibility of collecting monies from Hashers on a weekly basis. This Hasher also pays the bills, food, grog etc. All monies going in and out are to be accounted for. This Hasher also keeps tabs on run numbers, individually, for the club and badging. Badges are then given to the Grand Master to present when milestones are achieved.

Hash Lips - These people are responsible for running the Hash Circle. They highlight events on the run or humourous events involving hashers during the week. They are to be mindful of Chardonnay tradition and insist that all skols should be of cheap wine and the black box should be in use for milestones and major misdemeanours. Above all else they should make us laugh and sing, and should be given respect during the Hash Circle.

Trail Master - This Hasher is responsible for the organising of hares for weekly runs. This Hasher should also ensure that the hasher setting the run knows what they are doing. It is not acceptable just to organise who sets the run. One should consider varied terrain to run in, and using experienced Hares to help guide newer members when setting runs. The setting of a good trail is the most important part of a Hash event.

Hash Horn - Is about being loud on the run so that the slower runners can hash and catch up. The Horn should not be squeezed when not on trail. This hasher should not hash, but try to stay near the middle of the pack so that others may benefit from sounding of the horn.

Hash Flash - This Hasher has the responsibility of taking photos of Chardonnay hashers during the run and the lip session. They should also publicise these photos by emailing other Hashers, sending to the ON SEC for inclusion in the Trash, or by providing CDs at the end of the year.

Web Wanker - Is responsible for the maintaining of Chardonnay Web activities, posting of photo's for Web access. Current Web activities are Facebook Group and Chardonnay Blog.